Theatre Group
Come along to a Theatre group for adults with disabilities on a Tuesday from 4.30 till 6pm at Rievaulx resource centre Rievaulx Avenue, Billingham. Cost-£1.50
For more information please call 07728382442 or email amy.Stubbs@stockton.gov.uk

Childcare Consultation

Stockton-on-Tees Borough Council has a duty to ensure there is sufficient good quality childcare across the Borough to meet the needs of parents and carers, and their children, and which supports the wider social and economic development of the town.
To meet this duty The Children and Young People’s Strategy Team are carrying out consultation with parents/carers of children with disabilities and/or special needs to determine if there are any gaps in childcare provision and to identify any barriers to take-up of formal childcare.
Questionnaires have been handed out to parents for completion at various events/venues over the last couple of months. Once all questionnaires have been received the findings will be analysed and the results fed back to parents via various channels.

I would like to thank all those parents/carers who have already completed and returned questionnaires.

Childcare Business Support Manager
Phone: 01642 527208

Independent Living

The Council’s Independent Living team have updated their website to include details of different services and groups available as well as a News and Events page. To access this choose I for Independent Living from the A-Z of services. Or for more information contact the Independent Living team on 01642 527056 or email: Independent.Living@stockton.gov.uk

Information on ‘Fun Sporting Activities for All’

Multi Sport Club-
Date: Tuesday Evenings
Time: 6pm—8pm
Venue: Blakeston School, Junction Road, Stockton on Tees, TS19 9LT
Cost: £2 per session

The club is open to all ages for people with a disability who are wheelchair users.


Football Coaching Sessions 16+
Date: Thursday Evenings
Time: 7pm—8pm
Venue: Northfield School, Thames Road, Billingham, TS22 5EG
Cost: £2 per session

The football sessions are open to adults with a disability or special educational need

For further information on either football coaching or multi-sports club please contact: 01642 528510

Recycling, making it as easy as can be

Do you have a disability that makes recycling in your home difficult?

If the answer is yes, then hopefully we can help. Using the kerbside recycling facilities couldn’t be easier, and we can offer you help if you:

· Struggle to put your box or bags out for collection

· Can’t manage with the current size of the boxes and bags

· Find it difficult to read the literature in the current format offered

· Have difficulty putting your wheelie bin out at the kerbside

Just contact us on the details below for assistance:

Phone: 01642 395919
Visit: Environment Centre, 21 West Row, Stockton, TS18 1BT
Email: careforyourarea@stockton.gov.uk
Log on: www.recycleforstockton.co.uk

As you may of read a number of posts ago I had become a memeber of the Disability Advisory Group for Stockton on Tees. I am now able to share with you our latest newsletter. I will post it over a number of entries as it is quite long:

Welcome to the latest edition of the Disability Advisory Group newsletter

Access to Cycle Ways

a brief update was provided on access to cycle ways and the use of tactile paving. Towards the end of summer 2009 a survey of all routes will be completed and over the autumn/winter areas for improvement will be identified. Members of the group were positive about the use of tactile paving to guide them along existing routes.

Cleveland Fire Brigade

Disability Advocates for Cleveland Fire Brigade came along to meet members of the group, they explained to the group about home fire safety visits, where a home visit takes place to develop a plan with each person on how to safely get out of your home in an emergency, free smoke alarms will also be fitted if necessary-call 01429 874063 to arrange a visit.

People who are Deaf or have a hearing impairment can get access to vibrating smoke alarms.

Everyone should check the batteries on their smoke detectors, when the Fire Brigade fit alarms they trigger a re-visit in five years time to check the equipment provided. A member of the group expressed their gratitude for the work that the Fire Brigade has done, in particular to the Winter Warmth scheme which they said saved their life during the particularly cold period at the beginning of this year

For more information or advice please contact the advocate’s team using the details below:

Phone 01429 872311
Minicom 01429 874053
Post Cleveland Fire Brigade Headquarters, Endeavour House Stockton Road, Hartlepool, TS25 1JE

Stockton User Representative Group for Employment (SURGE)-Mental Health Issues

A representative came to talk to the group to challenge the myths and misconceptions that surround mental health issues. Some of the facts include that every year 1 in 6 people are affected by a mental health problem at any one time and the Mental Health Foundation estimates that 70 per cent of recorded suicides are by people experiencing depression, often undiagnosed.

SURGE is an independent user group that aims to raise awareness about mental health issues in the area, promote social inclusion and positively influence how mental health services are delivered within Stockton.

If you are interested in joining SURGE or would like more information, please contact us. Telephone: SURGE Office on (01642) 647744 or the Involvement Worker on (01642) 352914 Post: SURGE, Norton Community Resource Centre, Somerset Road, Norton, Stockton-on-Tees. TS20 2ND

The Mind Maze Volunteering Project

Christine Coulman and Paul Christon came along with representatives from the Mind Maze Volunteering Project to let people know of the opportunities available to volunteer as a mentor or get support as a mentee. It was an inspiring session with people sharing what a tremendous impact their involvement in the project has had, with positive and motivating stories.

Working across the Borough of Stockton and Middlesbrough the project supports people with mental health problems and their carers to enable them to make progress in their lives and achieve independence. We do this through the provision of one to one support and structured group activities.

For more information please use the details below:
Phone: 01642 633525
Email: christine.coulman@middlesbroughmind.org.uk
Address: Stockton Business Centre, 70 Brunswick Street, Stockton-on-Tees

Wow what a mad couple of weeks it has been, as you may have read I have been waiting for my MRI results, well I finally got them at the end of May. It turns out that I am not quite ready for the surgery just yet, and as a result my Consultant wanted to try the conservative routine to start with, to try and reduce my pain. It was agreed that I would undergo a sacral epidural in the theatre. After some discussion I left the clinic and came home to wait for the admission letter. I thought oh well at least this gives me time as I will have to wait a while no doubt. How wrong was I, I saw him on the Friday evening and I got a call on the Monday to say there has been a cancellation, and could I get to the hospital on Wednesday and be on the Trauma Ward for 7.30am.
Well 7.30 came and I made my way to James Cook Hospital, it felt odd getting there at that time of the morning, or was it the middle of the night lol. I arrived on the ward and waited in the reception, only to be told ½ hour later we don’t have a bed for you, and they where going to have to find one on the opposite ward, great not!!! I thought I’m in for a long day. The sister finally came and admitted me and then it seemed chaos from then, we had to complete loads of paperwork and then go straight down to the theatre which I did in my powerchair. It felt like playing monopoly pass go and collect £200 pounds.
I finally reached the ward with the nurse and was aloud to get out of my chair and get onto the bed, the room had the air conditioning on and it was really cold I have to say, I don’t cope well with cold, anyway I was wheeled into the aesthetic room while the theatre was getting prepared, it was like the red carpet was getting rolled out.
Into the theatre I went, it was an odd feeling because I have always been asleep when I get into the theatre and this time I was wide awake, WOW they big rooms aren’t they, I see them all the time on the TV but didn’t think it was going to be like that.
I have to say I found the sacral epidural very painful even though I was given a local first and my consultant bless him was as gentle as he could be and the staff where amazing with me, I think I had panicked them somewhat including myself for that matter because I had gone into spasm, and I have not had one for 5 years now. Although it felt a lifetime, the procedure only took 30 mins and I was wheeled to the recovery room with my head lowered, that was so that the drugs could take effect.
After a while I was taken from the recovery and wheeled to the surgical day unit, where I stayed for 4 hours, to give me time to pull round and the staff again was great and looked after me with tea and toast.
I was allowed home late afternoon and boy was I glad to be back it had been a long day and I got in my comfy chair and slept for a few hours. I have been off work for just over week now because I am still finding it painful to sit for long periods and still have periods of pins and needles. I am hoping that this will settle really soon, in fact yesterday (14th June) I managed to walk a little bit which is something that I have not really done since last October, so it shows that the drugs might be starting to work!!!!

A new door / venture opened for me early last week to take part in the Disability Advisory Group for Stockton on Tees, when this opportunity came up I jumped at the chance because I could see a chance for me to be able to help people through my own experiences and gain an insight and further experience from other disabled people from within the group, I also let it be said that I didn't know that Stockton had a disability advisory group in the first instance. All in all this has been my ethos thoughout my life to push the boundaries and this is the main structure of our website also, so you can see why I signed up as it is exactly what I want too do to be able to speak out in public and raise the awareness.

What is the Advisory Group

The activities of the group will be co-ordinated by Stockton-on-Tees Borough Council’s Diversity Team, who will be available to offer support to the group and its members.

Network Meetings

The whole group meets up on a regular basis to make sure that everyone up to date with what is happening around disability issues and to provide information about things that are planned for the future.

Working with Council Officers

Members of the group will be asked to use their expertise as users of council services to work closely with officers to advise them about the difficulties they have and how we can improve access. This will involve members of the group having meeting with the officers who look after different services or visiting sites or buildings with them to help us build in the needs of disabled people.


I will keep you upto date with how I get on within the group

Well yesterday I went to James Cook Hospital for my MRI scan, and for those who don’t know me, let me tell you I hate those machines I get so jumpy because they are so noisy. Therefore to my instant relief when I was told I could have a General Anaesthetic I was happier to have one, and when I say happier I don’t mean I was over the moon believe me, because having an anaesthetic makes me sick for hours if not a couple of days, so you can imagine my apprehension facing me yesterday morning, but I thought well I have to have it done so might as well get on with it.
6.30am came and I got up and sorted waiting for my taxi to pick me up at 7.15 and off we went said bye to mum (it was like the middle of the night for us lol) anyway got to the hospital in good time and I made my way to the day unit ward only to find the door was locked and I couldn’t reach the intercom (why doesn’t that surprise me!!!! In a hospital of all places!!!)

Anyway I managed to find a member of staff who kindly took me to the main x-ray dept, I was booked in and taken through to the small ward to complete all of the paperwork and wait for the anaesthetist, who was very nice and explained everything to me, because I had a couple of questions with regard to the metal in my spine and the magnets in the MRI, my understanding was that when the scan hit the metal part it would bounce off the magnet and distort the image, if not corrupt it all together and to all intensive purposes I was right, but they said that they should be able to get enough of an image to see what’s going on before I have the artificial disc surgery.

I then waited for a couple of hours for my turn and then I was allowed to go down, I was put to sleep really quickly and for the first time in I don’t know how many years I wasn’t sick when I came round, I don’t know what he gave me but whatever it was I will be asking for it when I have my main surgery. As far as I know the scan went well and I was allowed home on the afternoon where I slept it off and tried to eat a little bit, I didn’t think green jelly could taste so nice lol but there you go!!! I now just have to wait to get the results, hope it won’t be too long.

Well it is exactly 6 years since I had my surgery for Scoliosis and as you know I am waiting to have further surgery in the form of artificial disc replacement. Anyway following my recent consultation I have now been sent a copy of the x-rays that where taken on the day. Yesterday I also had a call from the hospital about my MRI under anesthetic and I am pleased to say I dont have to wait too long because it is the 26th March so I am getting ever closer to hopefully stopping the pain I have.

During my recent holiday from work, Mum and I visited the Stockton Independent Living Centre with our Occupational Therapist, to have a look at there adapted kitchen and see what could be done to help us.

I have to say that Mum and I was impressed with the demonstration kitchen there. The room had 2 kitchens setup, one being a height adjustable one, and the other being a conventional height. When I looked I was supprised at the height difference, although it didn't make it look out of place. Mind you when we came home and just looked at our kitchen as it is it felt a bit over powering and felt as if it was coming in at you.

I cant wait for it to get started because it is going to make such a difference too us, we just have to wait on the Council now to process all of the forms and our application for a grant. Once this has been sorted out the work can start.

Well we finally found the source of my leg pain at last, I went through to see Mr Papastefanou on Friday about my back and leg pain and unfortunately I have to have further spine surgery. I virtually spent the whole day at the hospital and by the time I got home I was shattered. Anyway I had to go for a set of new x-rays so that he could see what was going happening, it surprised me somewhat in that considering the constant changes in technology that here we are 6 years on and they were still using the old (or at least what I call old) x-ray method. I had one full length one and a side view; I have to say I was interested to see what my back looked like after 6 years.

When I got back to see him we compared the x-rays with those I had in 2005 and there was some significant deterioration with the one remaining disc that wasn’t part of the original surgery, so much so that I have to have the disc removed and have it replaced by an artificial disc, I was a bit shocked at first but then on the other hand I was relieved that we had found the reason for my pain. I now have to wait for a date to have an MRI under aesthetic as I don’t like MRI’s the noise they make makes me very jumpy so it can be hard to get the scan done, so this time at least I will be asleep and then after that we can discuss the full extent of the damage and plan for the surgery.

What is an Artificial disc replacement

Artificial disc replacement (ADR) is a device or implant used to replace a diseased or damaged intervertebral disc. After removing what’s left of the worn out disc, the ADR is inserted in the space between two lumbar vertebrae. The goal is to replace the diseased or damaged disc while keeping your normal spinal motion. Artificial disc surgery is relatively new in the United States but has been used in Europe for many years.

I will be posting about my new journey as it happens.

Well we are nicely into the new year and rising to the new challenges that face us. It has been a busy time for me since Christmas so much so that it feels that Christmas didn't happen, it went that quick. Things have been going ok for me and for Mum, Mum is progressing nicely with her physio and has tried elbow crutches very briefly not too keen !!!. I am still suffering with pain in my hips and back and I am hoping to see my spine consultant soon, I haven't seen him for 6 years, so in so respects although I am going with a new problem, it will be nice to see him and let him see how my back is doing. I am hoping the pain will settle soon as its pulling me down a little I have to say as I don't feel as mobile as I have been and feeling a little frustrated.

I have some high points to report on so its not all doom and gloom, during my time off at Christmas it sort of came to a head really how difficult it was becoming for Mum and me in the kitchen with us both using wheelchairs in there, I need to bee in my powerchair to help to carry things and help prepare things. So I decided that enough was enough something had to be done, I contacted my occupational therapist to arrange an assessment for Mum and to see if we could convert our existing kitchen into a height adjustable one so that it is a bit easier for us both. Anyway my OT came out and carried out the initial assessment and is very hopeful that we can have the kitchen adapted Way to go!!!!!, we are just waiting for the architect to come out from the Council and the kitchen designer to have a look at the existing space and what can be done.

While we are waiting for them my OT is arranging for Mum and I to go to our Independent Living Centre where they have a fully adapted kitchen installed, we cant wait to go and have a look and to test the gadgets.

Well since I have been off for the Christmas break I have been able to chill out and experience the joy of the Wii. To begin with I decide to go diving into the Endless Ocean to see what the treasures lay beneath the ocean



Then I kind of lost track of time, because I knew I was going to the Grand Prix with Mario to check out the competition and to have a race with the best in the hope I would come first



After that tiring event I decided that I needed a bit of a break and needed a little bit of a stimulating challenge something I could really think about, so I enrolled at the Big Brain Academy

What a busy time of year it is for everyone, and I have to say I feel like I have been on one of life’s rollercoaster’s, going up down and doing somersaults. Although there has been pain along the way, the majority of time it’s been great. The last time I wrote I was being investigated by my Consultant for severe pain in my hip, I am please to say all the scans and test came back clear and I am currently receiving inter-differential treatment from my Physio, for Sciatica. We are hoping that after the course of therapy things will settle down, if not I have to go back and see my Spine Consultant to see if the metal is irritating the nerves. I have had one course of treatment and things seem to be ok so I’m hoping that things will have settled by the end.
Over the last couple of weeks I have had to cope with a lot of changes at work, firstly moving offices and then my manager leaving to start a new life in Lanzarotte (and I wish you all the very best if you read this). I like my new office because I am back on the ground floor and I don’t have to worry about getting stuck in the lift, and therefore my stress level is much reduced which is great for me. I also like it because I can get in and out on my own so therefore I am gaining back my independence, and as far as I am concerned I feel like I have the control back and because I have that I can give my full effort in my job with ease, because the environment is much better for me and it isn’t such a battle for me everyday. I know we battle in our everyday life for everything but it is nice that I don’t have to be doing it constantly I kind of got a little respite so to speak, a chance to recharge my depleting batteries.
Mum is doing great with her Physio so much that she is catching me up, and I am so pleased for her, its quite strange now to see us both doing our home exercises together, but I help her and she helps me. So far Mum is really well, so we think that we might have our first Christmas at home, this being the first four years and we can’t wait.
A couple of weeks ago Mum and I went to Middlesbrough shopping with the help of Shop Mobility I have got to say what a great service they provide with volunteers to push people around the shops. If it wasn’t for them we wouldn’t be able to manage. It turned out to be a great day, buying lots of Christmas presents and hitting the sales in Debenhams, mind you I think we both where a bit overwhelmed by the number of people barging shopping, you wouldn’t think there was a credit crunch. We had to wait 10 minutes just to get the lift; I have never seen so many people and queues out the door. I know Mum likes to be in the think of it but even I found it a bit much.
Well this morning we finally woke to see the last of the snow, nice to see it cleared up after the last week we have had, had a few wheel spins! I love being inside watching it but I don’t like it when I have to go out in it

Well it seems like it has been a while since I wrote and I know it has been, I have had some highs and lows this last couple of weeks, and it started of with my best friend Daniel, who you may of read about in previous writings, well he recently had to undergo further spinal surgey due to his pelvis twisting, so he had to have more metal work put in, and although it was a big operation, he was home in no time and on the road to recovery, I have kept uptodate with his progress by phone and last week I had the greatest day because I logged on to my computer and webcam and got to see for my self how great he is doing Way to go Daniel!!!!! keep on keeping on mate

Then have had had a bit of a rough time with a chest infection and I had to have some time off work, so it shows how bad it was because it is ages since I have been on the sick from work, but following the infection I developed servere pain in my left hip and my Physio thought it might be a hernia from all the coughing I had been doing, so I ws off again to the doctors but luckily everything was ok. Although I still had the pain and it wasn't getting any better so I decided to go and see my othropedic consultant, who has looked after me for many years now.

After a full examination I had to go for an xray and I am and then the look of worry came and I was sent for an ultrasound scan of my pelvis to check for any infection, which could be the cause of the pain, but luckily it came back ok!!! a sigh of relive I can tell you, and now I have been given the all clear I am waiting to see my Physio and see if we can settle things down a bit as its still really painful.

Earned a silver medal - 519 points

Earned a silver medal - 26 points

Earned a bronze medal - with 34 points

Earned a bronze medal - 23 points

Earned silver medal with 9 hommers - 1532 Metres!!!!!!

I have been using my Wii for about a month now and I thought I would share some of my results

What a great week in the gym this week, you may remember that I have started to use some of the machines last week well this week I progressed one step further and was allowed to try them with some weights behind them. I had to keep stopping as it was making my back a little sore, but once I rested enough in between each set the soreness went quickly and I was surprised how well I had done to even move them and my trunk rotation is improving a lot as well. Although I can’t twist using my mid trunk I can now actually rotate just above where I am fused so therefore allowing new movement that I have not experienced before. It is an odd feeling and I am sure I will get my head around it soon. I then went over to one of the therapy beds to do some one on one work with my physio, we worked on some exercises with the wobble cushion and a walking stick, this was so we could work on my dynamic control, although my core control is good my dynamic control needs some work doing to help me understand better all the new movements my body is undergoing and to make them stronger and more stable. I couldn’t believe how much I was able to stay upright on the cushion when doing the exercises with the stick, normally I would of slid to one side during the first one but I balanced quite well, during the exercises it became apparent that my left side needs a bit of work as its a bit weak in comparison to my right side which is my dominant side. I explained to her that I have just bought a Wii and she was really pleased and said it was one of the best things to come out on the market and thinks I will do very well with it, I have to say since I started with it I have really enjoyed it its exercise with the fun element fun because you don’t realise you are exercising.

My Physio sessions seems to be taking me to new heights, following my Bowen therapy I am feeling really good and I cant believe how much more flexible I am, I know that might sound daft when I have a metal rod in my spine but to be honest its as if I don’t have my spine fused because I can move better than I ever have. This week I went back to see my regular physio so that we could have a catch up and a one on one session to see where we were at. At the beginning we had a long discussion about how I was feeling in general and I also talked about how felt concerned still that I was rotating from my pelvis still and that I wasn’t too happy, because I hadn’t rotated since well before my spine op and as a result I was concerned I was doing something wrong.

It actually turned out that the rotation I am experiencing is something quite normal and natural, although my spine is fused from mid to lower the top half is fine and it is that part of my spine that is allowing the movement to happen. I have not experienced this before now because my body has been locked up so therefore no messages were getting through to allow normal movement, and since having Bowen, my body has completely unlocked and my muscles are now functioning as they should of done all the time, so consequently I am now experiencing new body movements and sensations that everyone has when they move there body. I therefore don’t need to worry anymore just accept that its perfectly ok to do what I am doing, and above all enjoy the new experiences it gives me, I have to say it is nice not to be restricted anymore and movement is great!!!

We then went into the gym and I did some strength work on some of the machines and I have to say I haven’t been able to use the machines before because of the high risk of the movements causing a spasm but this time I was working out with the other people in there with the help of my Physio and it felt really good, although she warned me that I might ache and bit a bit sore, but again this is exactly what other people feel when they first go to the gym. I have to say that I do ache a little bit but I am not concerned I just enjoying the freedom.

Well yesterday Mum and I had our first shopping trip together for a long time, we decided that while I was on holiday this week we would try and go to Middlesbrough shopping. The only concern was that Mum cant push her chair very well, so I decide that I would ring Shopmobility up to see if they still did the volunteering side to help people with there shopping, and wow I was in luck!!! So I booked one of there volunteers in advance ready for our shopping trip. I then rang one of my good friends who have a wheelchair accessible taxi and we were off for the day!!!!
It was a little bit hair raising when we got to the car park because we had to go up the ramp and we just to say got under, I thought it was going to get stuck, anyway my friend said oh don’t worry we can go back as a convertible its fine!!!!. We managed to off load ok and headed for the shopmobility shop and I could tell on Mum’s face she felt as though she was free!!! This to me is something to treasure considering what she has gone through. We went into the shop to register with them and wait for the volunteer to arrive and then we were off!! Just as we were going to go out he dashed back to get a bag to go on the back of the chair. I saw mum smile and she said oooo that’s big, plenty of room for the bags!!! , so we were off into the mall and straight into the shops, Mum getting pushed and me whizzing along in my powerchair it was great because we didn’t have to worry about getting stuck or anything, and it was a reassuring feeling that we had someone with us, and I could see mum was relaxed, because the volunteer was really careful and we all had a great laugh and spend loads.

We went to MacDonald’s for dinner and although its big I thought it was a bit of a mistake because it was really busy, but we managed all the same Mum and I found a table and he went and queued for the food and we all sat together and had chat. Then Mum got her second wind so to speak and we were off again. By the time we got back to Shopmobility we had completely filled the bag and more and we had had a great time, and something that we will be doing again soon, now we know we can.

I had my final session of Bowen this week and now I am having a break from it to be able to go back to my regular physiotherapy. The plan is to see if I can maintain the amazing effects it has had on my body. During the session I explained that following the movement on my coccyx I had experienced a feeling that I can only describe as me being a bottle of lemonade that had been shook and the top been taken off. It was an amazingly strange feeling that lasted a couple of days. He thought that was good because its the one moment that has an effect on the whole body and by was he right, I then went onto explain about the rotation that I mentioned in my last entry, and he thought that might be just my bodies reaction to the new alignment and is ok, he went on to explain that I am slightly different in how I react compare to others, in that with me, there are a lot of things that wont change because that’s the way my body is eg the metal in my spine and my leg that is fused straight, although with me its been a case of sort of striping back the many levels so that body can learn and understand that things are different, and that my body is more aware of the changes and know when I am doing something wrong.
We started off the session as we always do and he said that my back and legs were so amazingly good, that I had been able to maintain the tissue change which is great. As far as he is concerned all the high tone and spascity has gone and my body is moving within normal ranges. This means that my body is the same now as someone who is not disabled; I have to say I agree because I can move so much easily and have no tightness or spasm worries at all. It pleases me no end because it has allowed me to work outside the box in that I am only restricted in the sense of the metal in my back and my leg being straight, other than that I can move within normal ranges and further, without any tonal reactions, and I feel really good. I ask the question whether I had changed since starting this treatment, and the reply was yes you are a totally different person, and if I continue to do the things I am doing that then we have WON the battle!!!!!!!

Today I have had an intensive Bowen session, it felt longer than normal, but I don't think it was. Anyway we repeated a lot of the work that we have been doing over the passed couple of weeks because it seems that some of the movements have had the most profound results.

Today I have been on the Unison Strike and therefore not at work, so I managed to fit in an early appointment and it also meant that I could walk to the physio department because usually I go after work and am always in my powerchair, so it was nice to be able to walk in on frame and it also let my therapist see my progress.

I gave him a full run down of everything that had been happening since my last session, and then I showed him the most profound think that had happened and I proceeded to leave go of my frame and stand completely on my own for a short period of time without wobbling!!!

During my session he did some work on my coccyx which was something new and I have to say I feel a bit odd but but great if you see what I mean. It is a weird sensation and my head feels like its going to explode and my legs feel a bit like jelly but I know this will pass and looking forward to the results.

Well I have had another session of my Bowen therapy and I have to say with some promising results yet again. For Many years I have always walked with my feet facing inwards slightly, sort of walking on the inside, and have had many AFO's, and they had held them for a while but I was never comfortable with them, so stopped using them. Then since I started weight baring and walking things improved a little and since I have been having Bowen, I have noticed that my feet are becoming more aligned and are flatter on the floor. When I explained this to the therapist he was pleased, and did some work on my ankles this week to help the alignment further.

Well it's Sunday, it's raining and out of the corner of my eye while I am typing this, something on the patio caught my eye, so I am wheeling upto the door and low and behold it was a baby bird waiting for its mum to come and feed him, I haven't seen a bird that small in a while, I just managed to take a photo.

Well I am not sure how this will go, but I have been thinking a lot this week and things have been going through my mind while I have been trying to get to sleep and one through really struck me. I was thinking that It has been 6 months since Mum had her operation and I feel that we have come out of the long dark journey and back into the light. I am not sure if she will accept losing her limb but we live in hope, because I know its a huge thing that has happened, but I do know that she's looking at it in terms of it's been done, I am here, and I just got to get on with it.

From my point of view I feel I have come full circle maybe that's the circle of life, but I am starting to be able to slowly but the last four years of pain and suffering behind me, and best of all, I have got my Mum back to the Mum I have always had before she was ill. The only difference now is she is temporarily in a wheelchair, but that doesn't matter to me and it should matter to anyone else.

I suppose I am learning to live with disability from a different perspective now, in that I have been born with my disability and my parents and family have lived with my disability, because I and them haven't know any better, but now I am learning to live with Mum's disability and its a sort of new learning curve for me, and I feel honoured to be the one to help her first hand.

Well it's the end of another week and a reasonably busy one at that. In terms of been out and about Stockton hosted another great farmers market and I bought some lovely marmalade and my all time favourite Wensleydale cheese and its not because it is a favourite of Wallace and Grommit, although I love them also, I just love the cheese.



Anyway during this week the weather hasn't been too bad and there was one day where it was really sunny, so decided to go out with my friends for a wander around the shops during our dinner. We all went to the Butterwick Hospice shop and I said ah, I will have to wait for you because I can't get up the step. The next thing I knew my friends had gone in and the Manager came out with a ramp, I couldn't believe it, in fact it was the first time I had seen this with any of the shops. So off I went up the ramp and I was in!!! this was great, because I could enjoy looking around with them also so was able to participate!!! Well Done to the Butterwick Hospice

Yesterday I had another session of Bowen Therapy after a 2 week break, and I have to say I am feeling really good, my body feels more aligned and I feel so much straighter which is great for me, because I didn't think I would get any straighter with having the rods in my spine, but I am and its proved me wrong, long may it continue I say. What is more my therapist is also pleased because my muscles seem to be more balanced and the tissues seem to be more level and maintaining the improvement. I cant wait for the next session to see what improvements there are still to be made, the more and more I have this therapy the easier my walking seems to be getting.

Well it's been awhile since I have wrote and that's because we have had a busy time of it. Mum is doing really well with walking and is increasing the distance and also the length of time she is able to wear her limb which is great. One thing that has frustrated her is that she finds it hard to reach the sink to wash up, struggle no more is the answer, and when I came home on Thursday we had a visit from Occupational Therapy and they brought her a high backed stool, so now she is able to transfer from her chair and onto the stool. Now she is happy because she can now independently work in the kitchen, so that in turn raises her confidence.

Friday morning I felt like the worlds strongest man, when they have to pull those huge trucks because the lift at work had been out of order and was fixed when I had arrived, I had to walk up a steep ramp to get up to the lift so I had to take small steps and lean forward so that I could get up, all I needed what the rope and the truck behind me and I could of qualified.

Well what an improvement Mum has made in last couple of weeks, she can now put limb on herself with just a little help from me putting her shoes on. It's sort of come full circle, because Mum has always had to help me with my shoes and now i am helping her, but hey I don't mind we all have to help each other in life. Her walking has really come on and today she managed a series of walks which is great compared to a few weeks ago. I think we will be racing each other soon!!!!!! It was quite funny because when she stood this morning she said "wow I'm not sure I like been this high up" meaning she has has forgot how tall she is because she has been using her wheelchair for 5 months, so has probably got used to been at the level and now she is able to stand again she is seeing the world from a different angle

Well I have had 4 sessions of Bowen therapy and I have to say I have seen some positive changes. This week my regular Physiotherapist carried out an assessment, as I have not seen he for a couple of weeks since starting the new therapy, so as you can imagine we were intrigued as to whether or not that had been any major improvements from her perspective, and guess what there have been (which I knew about). firstly she check out my knee flexion, which was a bit tight, although I explained that I had walked a fair bit today so that might be the reason. Anyway she let me settle a bit and tried it again and it was a little easier, so that test we passed, then I proceeded to walk full length on crutches and this is where both Physio's were surprised.

My Bowen therapist firstly because he had not seen me walking, but my main physio, was more pleased, because she had noticed like I have that my trunk is a lot straighter, but not only that she also picked up on the fact that I had less pelvis rotation, which I hadn't noticed, and because of that i wasn't using the rotation to step through making my gait more of a normal pattern.

We then proceeded to the gym and into the bars, where we tested out my ability to step up on the block, and this had also improved quite a bit, but what had surprised me was when I looked into the mirror I had noticed for the first time how much straighter I actually am now, before the therapy I had a definite lean, although I could correct it with some concentration in the passed, this time I didn't have too, which is a great step forward for me.

I then asked if I could test myself and try a walk with some walking sticks, I tried this a few months ago and I managed it but was a bit shaky and I wanted to see if I was still the same, and or if I was able to walk still. Although at first I was shaky, I did manage to walk further that I had originally with the minimal support.

Today, Mum has gone from strength to strength I am so proud, I feel like a proud parent, when your child does something amazing, and I bet dead down Mum was feeling the same, proud of herself. This afternoon, we tried a slightly different zimmer frame, one that was flat handled, rather than one with angled handles. I went to go at her side and her partner went behind again with the chair, but this time, she got up a lot easier and I didn't have to go by her side, in fact she was away on her own, and she managed to walk half of the living room, and then managed to step around and walk back, which was great for her and great too see!!!!! Mum's on a roll now

What a great start to the day, Mum not only managed to put her limb on without as much help from me this morning, but we managed a walk on the zimmer frame, with me at her side and her partner behind with the wheelchair. Mum did great as I had not seen her walk that far although she was really tired when she finished as it was quite a distance she had managed. I think she forgot that whatever distance you walk you have to be able to able to turn and come back, but Mum was ok because her chair was behind her. I was so pleased to see her walking, because people don't realise how hard it is to walk with the limb, a lot of people who I have talked too over the past couple of months have said is Mum walking now she has her limb, I reply not walking on her own no, and they cant understand why this is, because she has the limb, so I think they just expect her to be up and walking with it by now, and yes she is walking a little, but not how people think she should be, and it frustrates me somewhat.

On thinking about it I think, it's because they have not been in that situation before and therefore can't comprehend why it is so hard to do. Mum said this morning, that she would probably be thinking the same as a lot of people, why isn't she walking yet, and I said it's because you have become disabled later in life and you have to adjust to your new life and re learn everything, but you will get there because you have got the support

Oops that's Jim Bowen, can't beat a bit of bully!!!, I suppose his famous catchphrase does have meaning, because my Bowen therapy is smashing, on talking to my therapist he has said that the results that I have had are profound and out of the group of people that he is treating I seem to be the one who has had quite profound results, and I have to agree with him.

This week he carried out work with my arms and hands to see if my range of movement and general strength could be improved, with me putting a lot of strain through my arms to be able to walk. It came apparent that the movement of my fingers on my left hand were a bit awkward to say the least, so he said to see what results I get over the next couple of days. That was on Thursday and it's now Saturday and I have to say I can move them a little easier, they are not moving as well as my right hand, but that is my dominate hand, but I am hopeful that they will continue to improve.

One thing I did notice yesterday, we went to a restaurant for lunch to celebrate my Manager's birthday, and I ordered Spaghetti Bolognese, and I was supprised that I had coped with eating it, and I didn't spill any, which for me is very good, because I can normally gaurentee that I will spill it down my front.

It's been a manic few days recently, following my Bowen on Thursday I was feeling fine and then I came to a crashing end on Friday morning, got up for work as normal, and went to call my lift and bang down I went. I somehow managed to get my frame wrapped around my duvet and down I went against the chest of drawers. Luckily the duvet saved a bit of my fall and after sometime I managed to get myself back up and make my way downstairs, wobbly to say the least, and Mum never heard it because she was in the bathroom, getting sorted for the hospital. I got into my powerchair and just sat a while as was in a bit of pain by this point.

I was upset for a few reasons,

1 I couldn't go into work as I felt too wobbly and didn't want to run the risk of falling at work, so stayed home and rested.

2 I was annoyed that I had fallen which in turn frustrated me.

I rang the hospital and spoke to my Physio and explained what had happened, and he was shocked that I had fallen, considering I was doing so well, but he went on to say that it might be that if my body has shifted it maybe that balance is out of line a bit and body is trying to counteract this change. It completely made sense, so I decided to stay put till Mum came home from the hospital before I tried to get up and walk.

I am nearly back to normal now and pain is reducing so I will see what happens at my next session tomorrow

Well, what a strange day I am having, to say the least. Firstly I have been unable to get into work again due to the lift breaking down again. I was in and out of the taxi like a Yo-Yo yesterday first if was off, then it wasn't then when I got to work it was off again, so ended up going back home and I am at home now as it as broken again today.

Anyway if I was getting stressed yesterday I knew it wouldn't last too long as I had my third session of Bowen yesterday and since having it I have felt many changes and so look forward to the sessions. Yesterday was the first time I had been treated in the chair, this is because I find it difficult to be able to bend my knee in laying and therefore it makes it a challenge for the therapist to carry out the movement he wants too. Being in the chair was a little different but the treatment was just the same, we went back to the same moments that I had had in my first session, purely because I had had such profound changes soon after and we wanted to see if the same would occur again.

Well in answer to your thinking I have had some weird feelings and some funny results, by the fact that I came home after it did what I normally do on a night and jumped in the shower, and I mean jump, because I am finding that my transfers are getting so much easier and quicker. Following my shower, I noticed that when I stood up my trunk didn't seem to be as angled to the left as normal, and I just thought ah it's the way I am standing and so didn't think too much of it, and had an early night, I have to say I slept right through which was great.

Today I am still finding that my trunk is no where near angled to the left as normal, and it feels like my body has shifted some what, it is a funny feeling that I can't really say, only that I have a pulling feeling in my back. I decided to ring the hospital and speak to the therapist, I have a great relationship with all the staff there, and I can ring at anytime time to get advice and treatment. Anyway it seems that with this treatment, people can have a body shift feeling and its quite normal, so my worry was over, it is just my body adjusting to new positions and that's why my back is pulling some what.

I was so pleased to see another series of Beyond Boundaries, I have watched each one and I have really been inspired by the people taking part. I can so relate to all of them, no matter what their disability is. It seems to me that maybe because of our disability, we have, I know I do, have a zest for life and a hunger to want to achieve as much as possible.

I can particularly relate to the members of the group who have CP, although I not in the Andes, I feel watching them that I am taking every step with them, I know just how much energy it takes just to go a short distance, never mind crossing the Andes. I know they will achieve it and it will inspire them to want more.

Some of them have become recently disabled, and I can relate to this some what, with Mum becoming disabled herself. It hits people hard because it's something they may never of experienced before, but being part of a group will help them to adapt to the surroundings and by the time the journey has finished, they will have experienced something that many abled-bodied people haven't and I am sure that they will realise that being disabled isn't the end of the world, it's just the beginning.

Well as form the title you have probably guessed that my therapy is going well. I had my second session yesterday and it really was a gentle put intensive session, covering a lot of work. Firstly I transferred onto the bed, and this is where my Physio could see a difference, in the ease of which I had transferred, I have to say I had not really noticed. I then got into front lying position, which I have always found uncomfortable but bearable this week mind It did seem a little better. Anyway the Physio then started the treatment with the same movements on my spine hips legs and shoulders that I had in the first session, with breaks in between each movement, then I changed to laying on my back and he started to work a lot with my neck as he found last week and this week I was quite tight. There where quite a number of different movements some on my face and jaw.

After the session was over I then walked with him back to my chair and he was really please at how well I was walking with him, considering he had not seen me walked before. I then asked him if he seen an improvement in me and he agreed and said yes, you are becoming more level and there had been some changes in my spine (improvements).

I came home from that session and I felt really quite tired so went to bed early and I think it was one of the best night's sleep I have had in the last few weeks, result!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Well today I jumped into action again and helped Mum with her Physio, and I have to say we managed to put her limb on a lot quicker this week, and it's only the second time I have done this. Mum seems to manage a lot better and managed a few steps this time, which is great, although after she had stood with the zimmer frame for a while I realised that it wasn't wide enough and she looked as if she was gripping hold for grim death.

I then helped her to sit and bend her limb and I went and got my reciprocal walker, mind don't worry I didn't let her try and walk with it, but it is a much wider base and as soon as she stood, she looked so much more balanced and relaxed a bit and I think it was because it was wider and more sturdy. All in all considering she has experienced her first fall 3 weeks ago she has improved in a short space of time, I can even see a difference from last week

Well done Mum from you personal Physio

Well today I think I have found my vocation in life, what is that you may say, well to be a Physiotherapist. Mum now has her artificial limb, and today I spend some time with her, initially to help her to fit it on but then I helped her to stand in her zimmer frame, and my full instinct kicked in and there I was helping her stand and move the limb by supporting her. I was like me having physio all over again, when I had my surgery to straighten my leg and although Mum found it hard and strange (only the second time she has stood with it) she managed well, and she said that's because I have a great teacher, and I said, that's because I have been taught well, so I am well happy that I can help her to progress even if its through my experience I know she will master it

Well yesterday was my first ever session of Bowen, I have to say I was a little nervous about it, as I don't know a lot about it, but It was an amazing experience. I had to lay on my front, which I find a little hard to do but I was helped to do this. then once I was comfortable I had a number of towels laid over me, covering my back and legs, then the therapist carried out gentle but subtle movements, starting on my back, and then covered me back up and left me for 2 minutes, came back made sure I was ok, then removed the towels and carried out another movement. This went on for quite awhile, with break in between each movements.

I had quite an instant effect in terms that I was quite warm in a matter of minutes this was quite normal and as a result felt really quite relaxed, I think if it had gone on any longer than the hour I would of probably fell asleep.

I have to say I slept really well last night and this morning I feel really good to the point where I had managed to slice a banana onto my cereal, which normally is something that I haven't been able to do.

Well yesterday I had a very productive Physio session and came away very happy and curious to say the least. I tackled the stairs again this week and although I have been walking a lot more this week on my crutches I seem to be quite tight but having said that I did manage the stairs nevertheless, and my Physio wasn’t worried and concluded that I could do stairs. I then went back through to the gym to do further work on steps in the bars and I managed well. Then the fun started, a wobble board was placed on the floor in front of me, and for those of you who have read my story so far will of read about my experiences with the wobble board, and be wondering why this time should be different ?. Well this was slightly bigger than what I am used too and this particular one had a puzzle inside it, with areas cut out and 3 balls, the idea being that using your balance you had to move the balls into the holes, and after a couple of attempts I did actually manage to get one of the balls in the hole!!!!!!!

An example of the puzzle wobble board











After spending time doing the exercises, we went into discussion mode, the reason being is that over the last few weeks since using my crutches I am finding that I am tightening up somewhat and when I use my frame although it restricts me a little in terms of stride I am not tight. I have a theory for this and that is when I am in the frame I am in a more upright position, and in comparison when using crutches I am not in as much of a straight position. Therefore the way I am thinking is the messages travel with ease to the correct pathways when in frame position but when using crutches I am at a slight angle and the messages can only travel part of the way and end up going down the old pathway, and because I am walking a lot with them I am starting to get tight. When I discussed this my Physio agreed because it is a different posture when walking with crutches and therefore e you will experience different feelings.
As our discussions developed I was introduced to one of the new physiotherapist and we were chatting and they were given an outline of my condition and the problems that I have, and how I have over come a lot of them by using different methods and equipment, and how much I strive for better in my disability to achieve more that is out of the box so to speak, anyway the discussion deepened and I started to get excited because we have agreed that I would be a good case study for the new Physiotherapist to try out the Bowen Technique and see what results we achieve. I am very excited about this prospect and what challenges this may bring out. I am going to start this next week and I can’t wait.

So glad it is Friday an end to a busy week, poor Mum had her first fall so as you can imagine it has a massive shock to her, luckily she didn’t break anything, just bruised and help was at hand to help her back up. I think it had annoyed her that she had fallen because the action she was doing ie standing and reaching up for something, she has done many times without any problem. I am so glad she was ok all I could visualise was us going to hospital again, I said to her don’t worry its just one of those things it happens.

Then on Wednesday she went back up to the hospital to follow through the limb assessment and I think it had shocked her to say the least, the limb wasn’t what she was expecting what I mean it didn’t look like a leg, the consultant said oh don’t worry (but she did) this is just the model (it looked so scary to her, with the straps on ) he said once we have tried it with you we will make the next stage and then if it is all ok you can take it away to the Physio.

When I asked her about it she said that it had calmed her a little, but I knew she wasn’t happy. Anyway after she fitted it on she was then able too with help stand and move in the bars. This I think is absolutely great the fact that she was able to not only get out of her chair but to walk away from it in the bars. Not only did she manage to walk to the end, but she managed to turn and walk back to the chair.
Mum told me all about it and she said “I will never be able to do this, I will never be able to walk” I then had to have my positive head on here and I proceeded to explain to her that it was in fact a great thing that she had managed to do what she had done and also for the first time since the operation she had actually walked away from the wheelchair. I don’t think she fully realises what she has achieved, but I think it will dawn on her in time; she is quite down since the fall which is to be expected because obviously it has knocked her confidence a lot, so hopefully next week when she goes she will improve a little more.

Well as you can probably guess from the title of this entry, that we had another family birthday and yes, so happy 40th Ali it was great, everyone over to my house for a drink yesterday. what a fantastic card great work to all your friends who made it for you!!!

What's been happening today, well the bad weather doesn't see to of put people off coming into the town today for the full fun fair, it's been nice to see it so busy and people enjoying themselves regardless of it trying to snow.

Pretty amazing. These pictures are entirely made of food.

Well next Friday I'm off to the theatre with Mum to see Steve Steinman as Meat Loaf, we went to the Forum when he last did his show and it was fantastic and I can't wait to see it again

Here is just a taste

Some of you may of read the entry "For the Love of Rachel" well I am great friends with this family and I thought I would share or should some of the conversation that David and I had recently


Hi Susie!
welcome home
Many Thanks! Good to be back!
We took a 3 day cruise with the girls to the Bahamas very nice nice to spend time with the little ones

David you don't know how close Rachel is to me it was just like reading my life unfolding.

I am so glad that you read her story! Thank you so much for your kind words!
its a pleasure

Rachel is in bed today. Had a teeth cleaning and x-rays. She is such a sweetheart.
I really enjoy your blog

There seems to be many nice people who visit your site.

Amy just came in and said Hi

The reason I say Rachel is so close is because I also wore dolls cloths, ok i wasn't that small but was premature, so as I say we are so close its unreal

But the main thing is that you grew up to be a wonderful person!

thank u

I am hoping the same for Rachel and Amy

I like to think I I have achieved most things I want too.

I think it is not so much the challenges that we face but how we as human beings rise to try to meet them.

yes

It's the environment that makes people disabled

Excellent point!

Well it is because if there were things like lower kerbs lower door handles etc
there wouldn't be the issues

exactly

I hope you enjoyed my blog as much as I did your book my aim is to show it how it is
I really do!

is it how you expected it to be since we have met

I have been very pleasantly surprised

It is always easier talking to someone on the telephone so IM has been fun. It has also let me meet very nice people like you!

one thing that i hope you might realise is that there is hope for Rachel and Amy as they get older, what I mean is it is possible to be independent because I know parents of disabled children always fear for the time when they no longer there to look after them

Absolutely and taking to you makes me so much more appreciate that

That is a great fear of ours

it may just feel like a huge mountain and that you will never get to the top, Yes I can totally understand that fear and it is a real fear. Although there is one thing you can do to help Rachel and Amy, and i still do it today.

If Rachel can be independent and live happily it will be more valuable to Susan and I than anything Tell me..

Well it maybe something that u want to incorporate into life now and that is sort of 3 lists

1st is a list of everything Rachel and Amy if you wish can't do
2nd is a full list of wot they can do like use knife fork etc doesn't matter how small
then and this is the sort of action plan one the 3rd is a list of things that can be done eg small goals to help them and you etc to remove the can't items and place them on the can list. Eventually you should see the I cant list reduce and the yes I can do this expand, and as they get older the lists will forever change

That is wonderful advice. Thanks you so much I will share with my wife Susan!

By having the 3rd action one you can work on little things so that the can't becomes achievable and it might be that something is repetitive but and this is only something I have realised over last year or so which is that my cerebral palsy is slowly decreasing.

That is great advice!

And that is down to my own conductive education of repeating stuff because what is happening and I can only assume that it may work for others is

That is wonderful!

By repeating something by means of doing something in the same pattern, like picking up a cup, what happens is if you pick it up exactly the same way every time
then the signal realises in the brain that hang on a minute this is the same every time, it seems to bypass the damaged part of brain and resend it down the correct neuro pathway and reconnects properly.

I am a big believer in cognitive retraining!

So that Rachel's brain will send the correct message to her when she does that task

i have found since I started doing this movement with my reciprocal walker I can walk better and I don't have any muscle tightness at all, I believe that I have reconnected the pathways.

It shows just how much plasticity that is in the human brain

And I haven't had any medication for nearly 2 yrs plus the hard work to take advantage a different pathways.

That is terrific Susie!

Well all I can say is well done Mum, you might be thinking what has been happening, well she went to the disability centre at the hospital yesterday for her first assessment for her new limb, and it went very well.

During the assessment they made a plaster cast of her leg (stump) Mum said felt a bit odd but was ok, and then she will go back next week and start walking with her new limb, the look of shock on her face when they said that was as I can only guess was priceless, anyway they said once the limb has been made you will be in the bars next week to test it and they can alter things if need be if all is ok she will be able to take it away and continue her physio. I am so looking forward to seeing her walking again.

Well its only Tuesday and already I have had a good week, in fact you could say I am on a bit of a high, it started on Monday, although I had had a tough Physio session I decided that I was going to keep on keeping on and have continued to walk more during the day and that for one, seems to lift me. Anyway I attended my first work meeting on Monday, what I mean is I attended the meeting on my own without the colleagues in my team, as the time got closer I had prepared for it and as waited for the people to come, once settled I realised that I wasn't going to be as comfortable in my powerchair, so I decided hey what have I got to loose (other than the prospect of sliding off it!!!) I know I can sit on a normal chair (mind you it has been a while) so I bit the bullet so to speak and walked into the meeting and sat down.

The look of slight surprise on people's faces was quite nice too see surprised in the fact that I don't think they knew I could walk. Anyway the meeting went very well and I felt really comfortable to be able to discuss my points with everyone there. When I came out it was like I had had an outer body experience, in that there I was sat quite normally and participating without direction and the rest of me was looking down, when I say the rest of me, I mean my disability had left me and floated above me.

It was like yes I did it usually I have felt a little uncomfortable in meetings, particularly if I don't know the people attending, but I was fine and came out happy that I had achieved a couple of things yesterday.

Is it a dog or a reindeer, no its Jack auditioning to work for Santa this year ???




What do you think, has he got the job ?

Recently I have become good friends with David, Susan Rachel and Amy, this friendship came as a result of coming across there webpage on MySpace, Rachel and I have one thing in common and that is cerebral palsy. I chat with David and his family whenever we are able to connect on the computer. Rachel is a true inspiration to all who meet her and although I haven’t met her in person, I feel like I have know her all through her amazing life, you might ask how if I have not come face to face, well I have accomplished this through David’s awe inspiring account of his love for his daughter Rachel, and I have to say the title is so true to say the least, his love and devotion to Rachel just bounces out of the page.
I started reading and I couldn’t put it down, it brought a lot of memories back to me about my own life, how I was born premature, not as small as Rachel, spending time in a incubator and being able to fit in the hand of my Mum or Dad, I know that they were in awe of such a special life that had been created for a reason, and that is to show the way forward, and I believe that David and Susan felt the same way when holding Rachel. I also like Rachel wore dolls clothes as they were they only thing that fit me. At the time families believe that the constant machines will always be part of there life but as you read In the book it isn’t the case for Rachel and it wasn’t for me, we both came forward in the world and worked hard to develop our special lives so that we can fulfil our reasons for being here, and why shouldn’t we.

Then David Susan and Rachel decided that special lives were something that had meaning and the love should be expanded. They went to China and brought there love to Amy and brought her home to a special family where she could be happy and fulfil her life and be special also.

If there is anyone out there who is looking for inspiration and direction in there life then this book is one for you because I believe you will of found it here and if it moves you as much as me then it should move you enough to keep on keeping on.

Well this week I have slowly been coming back together and have been walking about as much as I could manage, to try and boost myself. I have just been taking it slowly because as the saying goes you have to learn to crawl before you can walk, but in my case it's learn to walk before I can run!!!.

Each day I have manged to walk for a little bit longer and yesterday I think I had walked more than I had in a while, because I had walked during the day at work but then went for my Physio after work. It was only when I was in physio when I realised that I have slipped backwards slightly so have a mountain to climb to get back to the top.

I started off with the gym ball in the bars which was fine at first but then my physio had to support me as my balance was off, which just shows how things can change because last time I did it on my own. Hey ho I will get back there don't worry (Rome wasn't built in a day) then we went down into the main part of the hospital so that I could practice on the stairs. My physio said get back in your chair and we will go and try them, but no you know me I said no I will walk it will be easier!!. Oh boy had I forgot where the stairs were it was a fair walk, well fair by the fact that I had already been doing some work in the bars so was a bit tired. Maybe I should of taken her offer of my chair after all, but then the chair would of won and I wanted to cross the finish line so to speak on two feet.

I turned into the ward and there was a side room where the stairs were, they were the same steps as I had worked on before, but some how it felt different I had initially completely gone back to my old habits, but my physio didn't say anything first off, then I turned to go to down and I just couldn't do it down the steep side, so lifted myself back up and went down the side I had just come up.

By the time I had tried it the second time I got up reasonably easier and even my physio said you are becoming more agile, it was like you could physically see the messages going down the pathways. I then had a rest for 5 minutes and then we tried something that I have never done, which is coming down on my backside, I climbed up to the one before the landing step, and using the rails, slowly lowered myself down so that I was sat on the top step, there I was siting quite easy legs out in front and supporting myself and then I followed the instructions and slowly brought myself down the steps. When I got to the bottom I thought how am I going to stand from this position, but my physio had already read my mind and got a chair and place it at the side of the stairs, and I got myself up by one step and took hold of the rail and the the chair arm, and with a minimal of support I pulled myself up to standing.

Then the fun started, after I had had a brief rest to connect myself again, I turned to face the stairs again and turned to come down, but this time used one of my crutches instead of the rail. This was odd to me because my head was telling me to step then bring stick down, but my physio said bring stick first then step down, at first I just stood at the top and looked and she said no trust me it's stick first then leg, so I trusted her and started to come down, but then we got to the one last one and I ran out of rail and I thought I don't know what to do, because I could see my other stick on the floor, but she said, bring the stick down and step, I said no I can't work it out I need the other stick then I can step down, she said no you won't be able to, then she looked at me as I was smiling, which tells her I can do it, she then relented and gave me the stick and stayed in front of me so that I didn't fall, and sure enough I used the stick and stepped down, and she just laughed, because she knew that was my way and it worked for me, OK it might not by the correct physiotherapy way, but she knows that I trust her 100% and she does me so the relationship works.

We then walked back up to the physiotherapy department and were talking say that it was going to be feasible that I could use the stairs if I had too in time, we just got to work hard on it because I was not ready for it now.

Well I have been using my reciprocal walking system for about 1 1/2 years and it still helps me no end even when I am walking on my crutches, I seem to be able to replicate the same movements which proves to me that the messages are still going down the correct nueropathways.

It also seems that I have opened a couple of doors I the Physio world too, I was contacted by my Physio who I have seen over the years at North Tees (it has been quite a while since we have seen each other,) but we are still in contact, anyway she was asking me about my reciprocal walker, and what I thought about it ie did I find it easy to use etc.

In the conversation I said that I thought it was the best thing on the market and that I had already recommended to my friend in Poland, who went ahead and purchased one and works well for him.

I emailed the link to my video and said that I think it would be a great idea to try it, I mean you have nothing too loose in trying it but believe me I think it will be worth it.

Anyway my Physio emailed back to say the frame looks great and improves my posture without the effort and that they were going to order one for assessment purposes.

I thought wow what a result!!!! I have made a difference hopefully to many others I so hope they have good results as I continue to do

Well what I great weekend we have had, especially yesterday when the whole family got together for Grandads birthday, we had a great little party for him. I am sure he loved it with everyone together, we had lots of cake and drink even Mum managed in her chair, Mum and I thought he might get a bit upset as he hasn't seen her since her op, but he was fine.

I did want I had planned to do also which I was pleased about, I had been working on my walking so that I could walk on the day and I did it, I know Grandad likes to see me walking. He thinks the frame I use is great the fact that it moves from side to side amazes him. Presents were sent from Aunty Hilda and Uncle Stan (Grandads brother) in Canada, but as we call them Laurel and Hardy. Mind you we all call him Archie, why you may ask well its because my cousin when she was little christened him Archie Bald because of his bald head, and it's stuck ever since.

All I can say is Happy Birthday Archie!!!!!!!!!!!!

Well I think we have started to turn a corner in terms of Mum coming to terms with things, mind you if I ask her directly she always says no not really. The reason I think she is but without realising it, happened on Wednesday when she went for her Physio. When she got there, a new lady had joined the group and mum greeted her and they chatted, then the penny dropped, Mum said "I know you don't I" the lady replied "yes we were in the same room on the ward" ah that's it!! after that they chatted like old friends and had a laugh. When Mum was telling me I knew straight away who it was, she was a great laugh and they helped each other through.

Mum went on to chat with her and share her own experiences of what its been like for her and that there is light at the end of the tunnel. The minute she told me that I thought Yes!!! Mum is starting to talk about it in terms of telling others what its like, which to me shows subconsciously that shes coming around too it without realising

Well what a really good day I have had again today, so I must be getting better. Anyway last night I booked another night out this time at Billingham Forum to go and see the Meat Loaf tribute in April. I went to see him a while ago and he was great and when I saw it advertised I sprang into action to book my wheelchair space.

Easter is here again and what a busy day I have had as have been hunting around for a special card as it's my granddad's 90th birthday, 90 I cant believe it and he's fitter that me!!!!

Easter brings back some great memories for me, the most vivid ones being the time I used to spent with my Aunty painting eggs. We used to put loads of newspaper on the big kitchen table and she would get all of her poster paints out and I used to have fun painting then will different designs. My Aunty was much better than I was and she used to paint Easter bunnies or characters from Beatrix Potter and then give them to the kids in the family. Each year she would paint a different theme and or what ever the kids favourite thing was at the time. I to this day still have my Middlesbrough FC one now that's going back a few years now, but it still looks as good as it did when it was done. I know this year she has painted Dora the explorer and a few new characters.

Well its Wednesday, which means it's Market day in Stockton!!! and today it was really busy with people buying this and that, it was great to see it really busy, I think it was the good weather today has brought people out. During my dinner break I went for a browse and bought some lovely roses made from wood shavings, dyed in a range of lovely colours. I also went to the Arc to book some tickets to see

Bobby Thompson

Written and performed by Peter Peverly

Saturday 16th May

7,30pm

Five foot nowt and seven stone wet through – in his flat cap and bagging jumper – Bobby Thompson’s Woodbine smoking “Little Waster” alter ego became a folk hero across the North East. Yet this hid a man troubled by drink, gambling debts and the taxman.

Its 20 years since Bobby dies, so don’t miss the return of this touching, heartfelt and very funny celebration of the life and work of this comic legend. From his fame as a radio star in the 50’s to his doomed T.V. series in the 60’s, and then his climb back to the top in the 70’s when he became king of clubland.

This is a must for all those who loved little Bobby.


“Peter slips with ease from narrator to bobby by simply putting on a cloth cap” Metro NE

I can't wait as I loved Bobby Thompson and he was Dad's favourite, I remember I bought him the video of the Little Waster one Christmas, and he was bent double laughing virtually crying

Well today is my first day back at work after a nice holiday, I thought I would not be able to see my desk for paperwork, you know what it's like if you work in an office and you have been away, but no I was surprised that wasn't as much as I thought there would be.

Anyway after working away this morning lunch time came and off I went for my dinner and have a look around the shops. When I got down into the shopping mall of the Castle Centre I found it quite busy, people going this way and that, interesting looks on there faces, makes me think I wonder where they are going or where have they been. I got down towards my favourite cafe and thought BB's or a hot pork sandwich, and today the hot pork won hands down I am afraid. On coming back to the office I went in the big card shop to have a browse, at the moment the card shops are busy with all the Easter cards, Easter now there's some fun memories which I will tell you about in the next entry

To people with impaired movement, the mobility scooter represents freedom to enjoy life and take part in the activities many others take for granted.

Shopping, socialising or just getting some fresh air can be a lot easier with the right scooter.To help people get the most out of a mobility scooter, Stockton Shopmobility joined forces with Stockton-on-Tees Borough Council for the Scoot Safe Campaign.On Wednesday 20, Thursday 21 and Friday 22 June 2007 the Shopmobility team was in Stockton High Street and invited anyone who had a scooter, or was thinking of getting one, to come along and learn how to drive them safely.There were demonstrations and a test track to try out the latest models.

Carers and family members were also welcome to attend and learn more about mobility scooters.For more information about the Scoot Safe Campaign, call Stockton Shopmobility Ltd on (01642) 605676.

I also got my five minutes of fame, coming across the crossing in my powerchair

Dame Carys Davina ("Tanni") Grey-Thompson DBE was born with spina bifida, and uses a wheelchair, and is considered to be one of the most successful disabled athletes in the UK.

Tanni competes in events over a wide range of distances, first competing in the 100 m at the Junior National Games for Wales in 1984. Over her career to date, she has won a total of 16 Paralympic medals, including 11 golds, held over 30 world records, and won the London Marathon six times between 1997 and 2002.

In 2000, she was awarded the Helen Rollason Award for her performance at the 2000 Summer Paralympics, and was appointed an OBE for services to sport. In 2001, she was given an honorary degree by Loughborough University, namely a Doctorate of Technology, having graduated from the university ten years earlier with an honours degree in Politics and Social Administration. Also in 2001, she was given an honorary degree by Leeds Metropolitan University. She has been named the BBC Wales Sports Personality of the Year three times — in 1992, 2000 and 2004.

After watching the item with David Cameron and his family, it just shows how people cope in different ways when faced with disability. I am pleased to see that he was comfortable and felt it important to give people a insight into there life and ever more so in a possitive way.

As not everyone one likes to be frank about living with a disability similar to Gordon Brown not wanting to comme forward about there family. Years ago if you had a disabled child it was never mentioned as if people were scared to talk about it, and today it still goes happens which is sad and shows the level of awareness in socitey still has a lot of catching up to do, so that all disabled people can go out in the world with there head held high.

Yesterday I was moved by a feature on This Morning with Philip and Fern, they carried out a very moving feature of what it has been like for a mother who's daughter had cerebral palsy and the long hard journey and decisions that she made

When Julia Hollander's second daughter, Imogen, was born with cerebral palsy, she believed that it was her destiny to look after her.However, within a few months, the stresses of looking after a baby that was in constant pain, wouldn't feed and never slept proved to be more than she was capable of handling.When Imogen was five months old she was taken to see a neurology consultant. Scans revealed blackness on the brain where her cerebral cortex should have been, this meant that her cognitive powers had been destroyed during the traumatic birth; the prognosis was that she would never walk or talk.

The news hit Julia hard and two days before Imogen was due to come home from the hospital she stopped going to see her. Julia had done vast amounts of research on how to care for Imogen this research unearthed the truth that they could simply not afford to give her the care and attention that she deserved. This lead Julia to take the controversial decision to have Imogen fostered.Imogen was taken to live with Tania, a foster carer who has been looking after profoundly disabled children for ten years. Julia explained: "Tania had a dignity and strength that made me trust her completely. I did not feel humiliated in the way I had expected. I could understand that caring for a severely brain damaged child was something she chose to do.”Julia is very much a part of Imogen's life (she will be six in July) and she visits every couple of weeks. "I want Imogen to gain all that she can from her birth family. But I know that Tania's is her first home. The ties are still loosening. When I talk about Tania, I call her Immie's 'foster mum' rather than 'foster carer'. Sometimes I think of myself not as Immie's mother at all. I could simply be the means by which Tania's child came into the world.

"When the Bough Breaks – A Mothers Story by Julia Hollander

After watching this it got me thinking about how it must of been for my Mum Dad and family when I was diagnosed. Mum said I know what she means that there was no help early on, when you were born I don't think there was a lot known about cerebral palsy 33 years ago, compare to what is known now, so we just muddled on because we didn't know anything else.

The way I see foster parents is more of an extented family and Julia shouldn't feel judged in anyway, because at the end of the day she has done the best she could for her daugter and that is all we need to do in this life is our best. In Julia's story see says "Tania had a dignity and strength that made me trust her completely. I did not feel humiliated in the way I had expected. " but Julia had the strength and dignity to do what she did and as I believe there is a reason for everything in life and life is for living and that is what Julia is doing, giving Tania the best chance.


Cam: This is Ivan

DOTING dad David Cameron was seen for the first time by voters last night playing with his disabled son. The Tory leader was filmed feeding Ivan, five — who has a rare form of cerebral palsy. A TV crew was allowed in as the family had breakfast at home. Mr Cameron’s daughter Nancy, four, and son Arthur, two, sat on either side of him.

He admitted the move would spark accusations he was exploiting his kids for political gain. But he insisted he was a family man with nothing to hide. He said: “You have to do what you are comfortable with. If you are trying to produce policies, people want to know about you — what makes you tick, your life.

“That’s natural. Politicians can sometimes look a bit apart from everyone else.”
Mr Cameron was seen offering his children a choice of Shreddies or Cheerios cereal on ITV News. Wife Samantha helped serve breakfast wearing jeans, red flat pumps and a trendy red top. Viewers got a glimpse of their smart kitchen and lounge in Notting Hill, West London.
Ivan’s condition became known days after he was born — and he needs 24-hour care.

Mr Cameron has told Radio 4’s Desert Island Discs: “We noticed he was having these very strange movements — sudden jerky movements. “Initially we were told he was fine. Then we went to hospital and were told he had a very rare condition, a combination of epilepsy and cerebral palsy.”

PM Gordon Brown has rarely been seen with his own children John, four, and Fraser, 20 months — who suffers from cystic fibrosis. He and wife Sarah have decided never to talk about his condition. But he once opened his heart to Sky News about the death of his premature baby daughter Jennifer Jane.

Mr Cameron let in the cameras as he prepared to unveil new flexible parental leave laws tomorrow. A Tory government would give all new parents a year of time off to share, he will say.
Mums and dads will be able to take six months together or split it between them. The first 14 weeks after birth would automatically go to the mum. Tories vowed the move would not cost employers or the state more than current rules — where parents must take leave one after the other. Mr Cameron said: “I want to make this country more family friendly.

“We’re not going to solve the problems of obesity, drugs, alcohol or educational underperformance unless we help families to do their great work.” Shadow Chancellor George Osborne last night praised his boss over the film. On the BBC’s Question Time he said: “There is massive public interest in the leader of the Opposition.”

Day out planned with great success

Yesterday, Mum and I decided that we would have a day out, considering I have been on holiday this week. I was up for it of course, and this would be the first time Mum had been out for a long time and the first time she had been out in her chair, so we decided that as this was the first outing we would go to Peter Barretts Garden Centre as it wasn't too far and there's plenty to look at. I rang my taxi firm and ordered 2 wheelchair taxis and then we were off, Mum was a bit nervous I think travelling in the chair but she arrived first then I pulled up behind.

When I got out I thought yes we have achieved the first step, now lets see how we manage. We took it slowly Mum pushing her chair and me behind in my power one. It wasn't tooo busy so Mum managed ok, then we got to the different displays and Mum was wheeling rather slow, and I thought ah she is tired, but no she was worried she would knock something.

After we had browsed all the clothes, we noticed that the resturant wasn't too busy so we dived in and the staff were a great help because it would of been a bit hard to carry the trays, but they were great and took the stress out of it. So there we were Mum having dinner and me having BBQ chicken it was very nice but we couldn't finish it.

After Mum had had a rest we then went outside to look at the plants and the fun bit was I could see Mum struggling a little bit so there was a clear path and I went up behind her in my chair and put my feet on the back of her chair and gently moved forward, thus pushing her forward. We then had another look around and then got the taxi's back home. We were both shattered and before I knew it Mum was asleep on the sofa and I was laid in my recliner and watched a thriller. A great day had by all