Self-Determination

Ever since I can remember, I have always been self-determined. It has been a contributing partnership in my life from the very early days of my being. Where did it come from? I could not tell you- but I knew it has been all powerful, and has always been there for me. I guess you could call it an instinct, a sixth sense- It was always by my side. It has walked hand and hand with me in every situation in my life, and everything I have gone through.

It has been like a trusted servant, or a very good friend, guiding, guarding and lighting my way. It was always there when I needed to call on it; especially when I came to major turning points in my life, and I needed guidance, answers, and protection.

I somehow knew I could turn to it, and rely upon it. It never turned me away, nor did it steer me wrong! It was always there, right in the pit of my gut, right near my heart. And the times I did not listen, it made me see and become that much more aware of just how important it was to do so. I could turn to it in a split second. When I needed it the most.
I would listen very carefully to its quiet, gentle voice. And I would listen to what it was telling me to do or what road to follow. If I was patient enough, and willing enough to go through the feelings and the emotions, I would always get the answer's I was looking for or needed.

When experts or individuals told me... ahhhh sweetheart, you know that this task is too difficult for you;... or, you know you have trouble learning... I would proved them wrong. I would literally take matters into my own hands without verbally speaking or saying a word to anyone. Them telling me I could not do something would fire me up inside, made me angry, and thus, gave me the motivation I needed to prove them wrong.

These were some of my most intuitive moments. I seemed to be able to hear what they were saying, tune them out, know that, that was their opinion, and intuitively knew that they were wrong in the pit of my gut. Somehow I was able to work these feelings and emotions out, released the negative impact these words, phrases, and tapes had upon me, and turn them around to become a positive and all powerful force within myself. I would become steadfast in my thinking, and affirm what I wanted to change within myself and who I wanted to become. Thus, believing in myself when no one else did, and acting on those beliefs within myself, ultimately transformed my life.

I am so very grateful to myself, because who knows what kind of person I would have become, if I did not listen or allow myself to be the unique individual that I am.